#1

November '99

It was obvious she had done without that which most are willing to die for and cannot live without.

And that explained the expression of disbelief on her pained face.

We tend to forget how round the earth is, and all its little "spin-off" circles and cycles it contains. No small wonder then that we found ourselves sharing the same facial expression.

"You can be looking someone square in the eye, and still not know who you're looking at.", I'd just told her.

"It happened to you too?", she said in a much too small for her frame voice.

I had been Debbie's last resort - she'd reached outside her normal circle for help this time. We'd buried her beloved brother just weeks prior to this. She had asked me to care for her cats till she got home. Home...

The word that means more for some than others.

I could say on account of her brother's and my unique relationship, I said yes. But I am not quite certain of that now.

Debbie had become suicidal but caught it in time to seek help in the form of hospitalization. From the scars running across her forearms from inner elbow to wrist, whatever troubled her wasn't new.

As I drove, I glanced in her direction, taking mental inventory of her "wellness".

The hospital itself seemed bleak - hopeless and lifeless. Only the fresh and angry redness of the latest attempt to end it all lent the situation any semblance of reality.

"Yes, And there are a LOT more of us out there." I had replied. "I know for a fact there are."

Hence the look on both our faces. Statistics say as many as one out of three. Could that be?

The horror of it all!

Just how horrible could it be?

Remember us. Remember us the next time you look someone square in the eye. Just how horrible could it be?

Do you know who you're looking at?

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